Our collective list of the top songs that emphasize lack of consent

Posted by Sarah Sloane on Dec 1, 2013 in Uncategorized |

It’s been sort of a running joke with some of my sex positive friends that we should make a warning list of the top songs that are….well, instead of using really rough language, let’s just say that they’re inappropriate in their objectification of and non-consensual power over others (almost always women, but not exclusively). So, inspired by friends on my Facebook page, I decided to start a post to collect your contributions. And yes, I’ll have another post to highlight the songs that we think talk about love and sex in empowering ways, too!

Leave a comment below with the song title, and why it’s problematic; I moderate them all, but will approve ’em (unless you’re just trolling) and add them to the body of this post from time to time, as well.

In no particular order:
Baby, It’s Cold Outside (he counters her objections to leave, and offers her more drinks)


Dec 1, 2013 at 11:07

“Walking my baby back home” by Nat King Cole.
Lyrics include this gem: “She says if I try to kiss her she’ll cry, I dry her tears all through the night”

Dec 1, 2013 at 11:10

“Summer Lovin” from GREASE
Girls’ Chorus: “Tell me more, tell me more, was it love at first sight?”
Boys’ Chorus: “Tell me more, tell me more, did she put up a fight?”

Dec 1, 2013 at 16:36

Not totally non-consentual sex, but alluding to ownership and abuse:

Human League: “Don’t You Want Me Baby”

In particular:

“But don’t forget, it’s me who put you where you are now
And I can put you back down too”

“It’s much too late to find
When you think you’ve changed your mind
You’d better change it back or we will both be sorry.”

Dec 2, 2013 at 22:50

Not necessarily non-consensual sex, but the Stones “Under My Thumb” was one of the first songs I remember noticing the explicit theme of female subordination.



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